Many years ago, some friends of mine and I created a monster. This monster has become known throughout the globe as Disco Stu. Disco Stu, some say, is my alter ego. But I tell you, ladies and gentlemen, that Disco Stu is more than an alter ego. He’s a modern Disco diety. And all the women worship him.

Anyway, two years ago, Disco Stu signed up for a costume contest at Kempi’s night club…and won!…$500 smacks! Needless to say, everyone was impressed by this feat. But Stu knew that it was from the power within.

The following year, while I was living in Paris, my good friend Patty K., took over the contest by wearing a costume caked in blood and bobbing birds, imitating the movie “The Birds” and walked out of Kempi’s half a grand richer. Needless to say, she’s been bragging about it for almost 365 days so far. Well, those bragging rights are about to be over, because Stu’s back in town.

Here’s a bit of banter back and forth that Patty and I had regarding the upcoming Kempi’s Hallowwen party this year:

Patty (via Mary Muldoon): You will EAT MY DUST and the feathers too.
Tommy: WOMAN! You betta RE-CO-NIZE!!! Just wait until the Mothership of F-U-N-K comes landing on your doorstep. Then we be seeing who be eatin fethas!
Patty: Okay Mr. Funkmeister – we’ll just have to see who RULES !
I got fresh birds, and word has it – they eat FUNK for lunch! And they’ll be plenty hungry come Halloween eve!
We’re out for Bloooooood Baby!
Tommy: From the Eastside to the Westside, everybody knows that when I shake my
Southside, the women start going Tommyside.
There ain’t NO way, you’ll be getting your hands on my green. It’s mine, and you betta get it through your skull, honeychild.

Peace, Love and Fro’s,
Mr. O. (as in the Big One.)

As you can tell, this will be an awesome place to be at on Hallowween. If you’re interested in joining us, let me know.